Inspiration has a funny way of waxing and waning. This summer has influenced me to become more present and mindful in my own life. It wasn’t a conscious decision – it kind of just happened. A different, simpler, lighter way of thinking has been activated inside my consciousness. It’s been a small rearranging of my thoughts and beliefs that has left me more peaceful, optimistic and understanding of ‘the big picture’.
Do you ever wonder why you’re doing what you’re doing? I thought the key to a happy and successful life came down to making plans, writing goals and diligently checking them off, one by one, until… I don’t know! Everlasting happiness? Success? Rich? #Blessed?
Our intentions are good, but the process is backwards. What if I’m missing the point? I wondered. What if it’s not about the goals, the doing, the striving and achieving? What if my life isn’t actually “missing” anything? What if true success is more about feeling at peace with where I am today and wholeheartedly accepting it? What if I don’t have to “do” anything to FEEL better? What if all of this “doing” is actually blocking what I want? What if I just decide to feel better and the path to where I want to go will work itself out? We (I!) set goals and write to do lists because we think we have to physically DO all of these things in order to achieve “happiness”.
We spend a lot of time seeking “how-to” information in books, the internet, our peers, and social media personalities: “How to create the life of your dreams in 6 easy steps!”; “How to quit your job and travel the world indefinitely!” It sounds dreamy, doesn’t it? We’re trying to acquire some magical, illusive blueprint on how to live. We don’t trust ourselves. We think everyone else has all the answers. It’s less about the ‘things’ and ‘doing’, you see. What we’re actually seeking are the highest emotions: happiness, love, clarity and peace.
Alignment before action.This ah-ha moment of clarity washed over me while I was observing a Dragon Boat race last month. As I watched a handful of boats line up into their respective lanes and wait for the cue to start, a deep understanding washed over me: You have get yourself into alignment before you take action. Alignment is the emotion of how we want to feel. The action and ‘the flow’ that stems from all forces paddling together is so much easier [when we commit to alignment before action] because there’s less resistant. The inspiration for action will come when we’re not trying to make anything happen.
So, while goals are great, it can sometimes be like putting the cart before the horse. We can say we want a new experience – a new job, starting a family, falling in love, etc. But if we’re overly focused on acquiring and obsessing over it, “What do I need to DO to make it happen?” we block it. When we feel as though it’s already ours, it’s on the way. That’s what alignment feels like. Joy, peace, clarity.
I like to remind myself the things I want already exist. It’s not my job to make anything happen – it’s my responsibility to allow it.
My #1 intention is life is to feel good. When I keep it as simple as that, I naturally gravitate towards activities and behaviors that align with it. There are some physical, nurturing actions we can take to help us get into and stay in alignment, though. Here’s what I’ve been regularly enjoying this summer:
-Going for long solo walks in parks (usually without my phone)
-Sitting outside and observing nature and how perfectly everything co-exists
-Taking epsom + sea salt baths in the dark
-Running without my Fitbit (or phone!)
-Talking about my feelings
-Brewing my own kombucha
this batch was raspberry, strawberry kiwi & apple lime
-Listening to Abraham Hicks on YouTube
-Reading soul food + beach books
-Decreasing my social media time (and not feeling like I need to keep everyone updated on my life or photo document it – because really, who actually cares?)
-Keeping crystals near me – desk, bedside table, in my pocket, backpack
-Diffusing Saje oils at home
-Only working out when I truly want to and adjusting my exercise depending on where I’m at in my cycle
-Eating a lot of ice cream cones, green smoothies, peaches, cherries & blueberries
-Resting more and getting out of the masculine, left brained “go, go, go!” mindset. When I get caught up in too much “doing”; anxiety and stress rushes in. When I connect the dots, it’s because I haven’t been nurturing my feminine side, creating imbalances.
Masculine: goal oriented, fixing, achieving, high intensity workouts, not allowing others to help, trying to fix everything myself, keeping emotions bottled up
Feminine: carefree, go-with-the-flow, intuition, trusting and allowing, creative, quiet, introspective, asking for help, talking about my feelings, spending time in nature, stillness, being okay doing nothing
We need to nurture both aspects! I’ve noticed I’m naturally more masculine in the first two weeks of my cycle, and feminine the last two. So yeah! This is what I’ve been up to this summer. Living more, doing less and disconnecting from social media + becoming more in tune with my own life, right here, right now.
Over to you:
Do you find you’re more feminine or masculine? How do you bring yourself back into balance?
What have you been up to this summer?