simple pleasures + practical ways to self soothe

One of my favorite Rumi quotes and a lesson that’s shared over and over and over again by spiritual leaders is:

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it”

You have to feel it before it can come. Less pushing + resistance;  more relaxing + allowing. The emotion attached to our desire is what summons “it”. Whenever there are long delays in getting what we want, it’s usually because we’re holding it away by noticing it’s absence. Refusing to feel {a little bit} better now.  Trying to force things into fruition.  Resistance pinches us off from being in the receptive flow.

I know this is a difficult concept to accept because as human beings in the modern world, we’re used to going, going, going all.day.long. We are taught in order to be successful and happy, we need to chase after what we want. I think that is such a weird and backwards way to view life. So far, life has taught me that anything truly worthwhile came into my life experience when I wasn’t trying!

The universe isn’t keeping tabs or score on how ‘good’ we’ve been and rewarding us accordingly. It is always and only reflecting what we believe and how we feel about ourselves.  The ‘asking’ is less about words and instead, feeling as though it’s already done.  We’re obsessed with telling it ‘like it is’ and observing our current circumstances.  The real work comes down to tuning into the frequency of how the object of attention (our desire) feels and becoming a match to it instead of focusing on the object. And then it comes. It always does. When we change the way we feel, everything around us starts to change. Isn’t that awesome?

That said, there are certainly actions we can take to make ourselves feel better. Instead of writing five year action plans and feverishly getting to work, we can take things day by day. Small, determined steps to simply FEEL BETTER NOW on the path to creating what we’d like to experience.

Intuitive exercise

As you know, I’m loving Orangetheory, boxing and short distance running in the mountains. For the past few months, I’ve been leading two group runs per week and it’s been absolutely wonderful to connect with people on the trails.
“You’re like a life coach and person-walker!” they say to me. “This should be your full time job” (I agree! 😉 )
I’m not running as much as I used to, but I feel so good – energized, strong, happy and excited about my workouts.  I haven’t run longer than 10km in months and I’ve shed the identity of a runner. I’m just me.  It turns out I love strength training and boxing WAY more than running right now. Who woulda thought!?

Flower + essential oil baths

Ask your grocery store’s floral department for petals. Mine sells huge bags of petals for $2!

Intuitive eating

I created a short Instagram story about this last week where I confessed I’m maintaining a high frequency of feeling good with no GI issues DESPITE the fact I’m eating everyyyyythang. Food is just food. It matters how we FEEL about what we’re eating more than which foods we’re consuming. It’s all nourishing in some way. With this attitude, you’d think I’d be going ham on pizza, cookies and junk food all day, but I’m not.

This sweet potato + burnt marshmallow ice cream was wonderful! I’m all about eating satisfying foods and snacks most days. Other days, I don’t have time to think about meals and I simply need fuel – whether that comes from a green smoothie + eggs or a sugary bakery muffin. I don’t give a shit.  We make such a big fucking deal about what we’re eating. It’s boring.

I was blown away by your responses on Instagram regarding my little food rant.  Ya’ll seemed to appreciate my defining moment when I realized I needed to get some real hobbies and understand what’s truly important in life. Eating clean doesn’t make you a good person. You can just BE a great person. Whoa – what a concept! 😀

Conscious creation is my thing. Elevating myself, being of value to everyone I meet, connecting with hearts, cultivating amazing relationships, love, joy, family and making the most out of this human experience is what matters.  I don’t want to waste it.

Reading self development books. Here’s a few suggestions:

The Miracle Morning – Hal Elrod

You Are a Badass + You Are a Badass at Making Money – Jen Sincero

Think and Grow Rich – Napoleon Hill – this book blew my away. It was first published in 1937 and is all about vibrational alignment/law of attraction.

Reading, watching and listening to anything inspiring is one of the easiest things we can do.  I’ve noticed I naturally tend to stay away from sad, depressing tv shows, movies, books, media and people because I don’t like how they make me feel. (Although I love a good psychological thriller book here and there!)

Nature therapy

Spending time outdoors is so under-utilized. Nature has always been there for me – through ups, downs and everything in between. It feels like my best friend and confidant. Don’t ya love how stress and tension seems to melt away when you’re on the trails?


Over to you:

What are some of your favorite ‘self soothers’? 

One Reply to “simple pleasures + practical ways to self soothe”

  1. Nature for sure is my number one!! Going for walks. Lifting weights and moving my body in an empowering way. Lighting candles. Snuggling with my cat, Donkey.

    I feel so connected to you via what you share. I just shout to my computer screen, “I hear you girl” as I vigorously nod my head. Thank you for the validation and honesty.

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